Is your Christmas simple, radical, spiritual?

Traditionally, Quakers don't celebrate special days. Previous generations had a testimony against 'times and seasons'. Instead of celebrating the birth of Jesus on a pre-arranged day, Quakers have seen it as equally relevant all year. In the same way that Quaker meeting for worship is open to inspiration and not planned in advance, Quakers remember the birth of Jesus and other elements of the Christian story (and other stories) when we feel moved to do so rather than when it says so on the calendar.

One way to think about the early Quaker rejection of the celebration of Christmas – and other special days of all sorts – is to see it as bringing the calendar into line with other Quaker practices. Early Quakers didn't think one day was necessarily more special to God than another, any more than one person was automatically closer to God than another. They didn't use titles or change their language to reflect social status among people, and so they also didn't want to change the way they behaved for a calendar which people had constructed.

By taking that idea and applying it to today, we can ask a different version of the question about Quakers and Christmas – rather than a yes or no, do they or don't they question, it becomes a question about whether particular Christmas traditions are in line with what Quakers today understand God wants. If the way Quakers today respond to Christmas celebrations is giving evidence about Quaker spirituality, what is that testimony telling people?

There are many possible messages and we can think through what we want to say with actions as well as words. Here are four questions I ask myself when I'm thinking about whether and how to participate in Christmas activities.

Is it honest for me to celebrate Christmas?

Quakers in Britain today have a range of different experiences of the Christian story. Some are believers in it all. Some reject the supernatural elements, or some parts of Christian teaching. Many value Jesus as a teacher and an example to follow.

Personally, my connection to Christianity varies from outright rejection (especially of some parts of the tradition which seem to me to be immoral, such as patriarchy), to cautious engagement (especially with womanist, feminist, Black, queer, and liberation theologies). I'm also culturally Christian and whatever my beliefs, it's an important time for many of my family and friends.

That makes me want to be careful about how I celebrate Christmas: not to reject it automatically, but to think through what meaning my celebrating, or not, might have.

Are my Christmas plans simple and sustainable?

Quakers as a community are concerned about the climate crisis. Historically, Quakers have always favoured the plain – simple, good quality, not necessarily cheapest, and without unnecessary distractions – over the most modern or fashionable. Together, these principles can shape decisions in the lives of individual Quakers. For me at Christmas, it means considering carefully what's needed. I don't mind giving gifts when they're wanted and meaningful, but try to avoid getting extras. Having a Christmas tree is very important to my wife, but we've been reusing the same plastic one for years rather than buying multiples.

Beyond gifts and decorations, making any Christmas plans I have simple and sustainable can also mean thinking about what travel is important, what activities nurture me rather than adding too much stress, being realistic in the food shopping, and focusing on love and justice more than my greed or desire for material things.

Do I understand and share what's radical and meaningful about the Christmas story?

Whether or not it goes with a seasonal celebration, there are potentially useful messages in the Christmas story. In the story of a family who have to leave their home and a baby born in a place intended for non-human animals rather than people, there can be inspiration for support for refugees and the equality of all beings.

In the idea of the incarnation, which can be understood as the divine choosing to be born as vulnerable child, there can be an important message about the importance and worthiness of human bodies. These are the messages of love and justice which I hope a Christmas celebration can bring – in December or whenever I feel moved.

Am I led to celebrate Christmas at this time?

This is the ultimate decider and it comes down to the discernment of individual Quakers and meetings. What does love require of us in these particular circumstances?